Rekindling an Old Romance on Facebook

Nov 22 2010
Rekindling an Old Romance on Facebook

Rekindling an Old Romance on Facebook
There has been much discussion lately about the inherent dangers of cyber-delving into the past and rekindling old romances. Paul Chai, in his article ‘Old Flames, New Media’ (Sunday Age, 21 Nov, 2010) comes to the conclusion that, rather than encouraging infidelity, social media is a way to face the ghosts of girlfriends past. He surmises that he has no doubt that many marriages have suffered and faltered through cyber affairs but wonders how many marriages have been saved by the realisation that past flames are just that and a revisit on Facebook often assists in snuffling them out.
However in the forums on www.marriagehelper.com it is noted that ‘even though husbands get involved online as well, interestingly, most couples come to our workshop because the wife became entangled with another on the internet.’
This was certainly the case in our book ‘Lover Husband Father Monster. Jennifer Hoare rekindled her relationship with her first love Tommy when his name popped up on her Facebook site asking her to be his friend. It seemed to be innocent enough at first but she was dissatisfied with her marriage and this contact with her first love quickly became cyber sex, leading to a real life affair, breaking up the family and ultimately, ending in disaster of the worst possible kind.
‘Lover Husband Father Monster’ examines many themes present in modern day partnerships- marriages of convenience resulting from the ticking of the biological clock, control and ownership of one person by another within a partnership, escalating violence, economic pressures against a failing Irish economy, the refusal to let go- and it is told from two prospective, his and hers.